High School and Friendships

High School, a place where it’s the “best years of your life” for most or for some it’s not. A place where you start “finding yourself”, again for most it is and for most it’s not. Now I’m not going to sit here and say I had the worst time ever but I didn’t have the best time either. When people ask me if I miss high school my answer is always no. I don’t miss it. I have kept this to myself for so long because I didn’t know how to put it into words and I didn’t know if people would understand. So here it goes, I was always the quiet one and honestly I didn’t have a lot of friends. You would think being a cheerleader (yes I was one lol) i’d have plenty of friends but for me that wasn’t the case. I had maybe 1 or 2 friends I would always talk to and hang out with at school. I never had that big group of friends. Thinking back to it now its crazy. I would come home and just feel sad and depressed. I would sit there and think why don’t people like me? Why am I the loner? Why don’t I have friends like my brothers? They always had a big group of friends and I envied that SO much. I never went to parties or was social. Not until my senior year, I wasn’t a cheerleader anymore so I didn’t have that. My one friend I was close to moved. I had a boyfriend this year so I had that. I would hang out with his group of friends and go to parties only because I was basically the tag along. They were never really my friends. I didn’t know who I was. I had got bullied a couple times. I never really found myself in high school I was still trying to figure that out. Once I had graduated I felt kind of a relief. I didn’t have to think about going back to that place but I was still worried, is this how my life is going to be when I get older? No friends? No, that is not the case. But I was stuck in this slump and fell into this dark place for a couple months. I didn’t end up going to college and I didn’t have a job so I felt alone. I didn’t know what I was doing with my life. Until beauty school happened. I had went to beauty school about a year after I graduated high school. I was nervous as hell. I didn’t think I would make any friends because thats how it was in high school but I was wrong. Going to beauty school was probably the best decision I had made for myself. I met some amazing people there. We were all there for the same reason so it was nice too finally talk to people who understand you. It was nice to finally have people to hang out with and they actually enjoyed your company. But as I had said I didn’t realize what I was going through back in my high school days until about a year ago. Who I was then is not who I am now. I have definitely become a better version of myself. I let go of high school friendships I had thought cared about me but I was wrong. I have the most amazing group of friends right now in my life. Whether they are co workers, my friends that have been with me through thick and thin and those who I have just become close with in the last couple years. YOU ALL KNOW WHO YOU ARE. It is so nice to have people who get you. People that are easy to talk to and I can be myself around and have a good laugh with. I don’t open myself up to a lot of people but I have found those who I can. They are all just as crazy as me and I love it lol. You live, learn and grow every single day. If you or someone you know is going through the same thing right now just know it ALWAYS gets better. I feel like I am in a good place right now, yeah I have my days but who doesn’t? We’re all human. Find your passion and do something you love because it can open so any doors. The older you get the more aware you become and the more you know what your worth and who you want in your life. Its okay to be that person who doesn’t have those high school “friends”. Make friends with people who actually care about you and enjoy your company. I don’t know if any of this had made any sense and I don’t know how many of you will understand and I didn’t make this post for anyone to feel “sorry” for me. I want people to know that you are not alone.

XO

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1 Comment

  1. Danielle
    November 8, 2017 / 10:41 am

    I’m thankful to have spent time gettting to know you sophomore year, Danielle😊

    -Danielle

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